Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Top 10 Worst Religious Country Songs of All Time: #9 - Jesus Was A Country Boy

This week's pick for one of the worst religious country songs of all time is Jesus Was A Country Boy by Clay Walker.

Apparently the guy in the song is fed up with all the high tech preachers on TV and therefore reaches the logical conclusion that Jesus must have been a good ol' boy. Check out this gem of a chorus:

Cuz Jesus was a country boy
Walkin' down a dirt road with everything that he owned
He never met a stranger
Born in a barn, underneath the stars
His momma laid him in a manger
Swimmin’ in the river fishin' for his dinner livin' with the sinners like me
Makes me think that Jesus was a country boy

I don't even know where to begin with this. First of all, I doubt they had asphalt back then, so of course Jesus was on a dirt road. And unless he had a nice storage unit or airport locker, he would pretty much have to cart around everything he owns. I don't see being born near a bunch of piles of cow manure to be something to brag about either, and since the Wal-Mart Supercenter in Jerusalem probably wasn't finished yet, he would undoubtedly had to have fished for his food.

After this atrocity of a chorus, the song then goes on to ramble about the man's father and how he wasn't religious, but he was going to heaven anyway because Jesus was a country boy just like him. How is that fair? So what, all of the urban non-religious people are doomed to hell? Yeah, that seems fair.

This is why religion is stupid.

Clay Walker, you should be ashamed of yourself.

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