Monday, May 21, 2007

Coors Light: The Dunce of Light Beers

The following is a re-post of an entry that I made in my other blog many moons ago. I feel that the material is still very relevant and I am interested to know other people's opnions on the subject.

Given the choice between a pitcher of Miller Lite and a pitcher of Coors Light, one night, my friends and I opted for the Miller, soley based on taste. The consensus at the table was that Miller is tasty, and Coors tastes like donkey piss.

I think I know why.

According to the Miller website, Miller Lite is brewed with "only the finest malted barley and choicest hops." Basically, the people who brew Miller are dedicated to making a beer that is actually pleasing to the taste buds. Aside from Miller, many other light beers are also pretty tasty.

Except Coors Light.

So where did Coors go wrong? Venture into the history section of the website, and you will see that founder Adolph Coors decided that using mountain spring water would make for yummy beer, which is why he built the brewery and headquarters in Golden, Colorado. Therein lies the problem. While the fine people at the Miller breweries are carefully selecting hops and barely, the people at Coors are using water that deer and other woodland creatures generally relieve themselves in. Hence the reason some say Coors Light tastes like "piss water."

Now I'm sure they try to purify their water and all, but it seems they should probably focus less on the H2O and more on the stuff that is actually going to affect the taste of the beer. This is probably why Coors has to market Coors Light as "the coldest tasting beer in the world." Too bad that is a lousy marketing strategy.

"Our beer tastes like ass...but it sure is cold!"

Good one, Coors.

There is also an interesting twist. Another agreement we came to at our table last night was that Killians, especially Killian's Irish Red, is totally delicous. So I looked into the matter and guess who I found out makes Killians?

You guessed it...

...Coors!

Now how can a single company make something so tasty and then turn around and make something that tastes like liquified cardboard?

Beats me. But I sure as heck won't be "Tapping the Rockies" anytime soon.

-Hessie

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